It's all about the Pentiums.

SOUND THE ALARM! AMERICA IS UNDER ATTACK! FROM THE INTERNET! (And it’s not from pesky blogs like US Democrazy.)

Hackers have been breaking into very important computers at very important places around the US (remember the movie WarGames?).

The US electrical grid was invaded by hackers who left malicious malware programs behind. Hackers have unsuccessfully (thanks to quality security software) probed NYPD computers.

Even the Pentagon, an assumed cyber stronghold, has been penetrated with hackers stealing information on America’s newest jet, the Joint Strike Fighter.

America is not the only one in the cyber cross-hairs. The Dalai Lama, spiritual head of the Buddhist faith, as well as other good folks around the world have been hacked.

But don’t worry, America! Our computer guys, gals, and geeks are gearing up to fight back. The Department of Homeland security is looking to hire White Hats (hackers on the side of the law) to combat cyber assaults.

To successfully fight back we need to know our enemy, right? Evidence shows that many hackers are from China (the attacks often include pro-China slogans and target pro-Tibet and Taiwan groups).

Is this a secret Chinese government plot to weaken America?

Some say no. More likely it is individuals typing away in a darkened room (like us here at USDemocrazy).

They could be anyone from nationalist code crackers to nerds armed with computer skills and spare time (that sounds familiar), to people with fast Internet connections and a penchant for politics (sounds very familiar) and folks with a poor understanding of humor (wait, I think they’re talking about us).

We are hoping the Internet hackers don’t invade our computers in search of valuable information. Should they succeed, the only treasure they will find is a treasure trove of bad jokes.